Mike O’Hearn – Modern Day Font In The Church Of Testosterone Or Con Man?
Mike O’Hearn is a modern day enigma, at 40+ years of age and looking like the perfect image of masculinity itself it would be hard to believe he is all natural or ‘natty’, but that’s what he would have us believe.
Now, we all know, once you start to push through your thirties, your natural production of testosterone starts to slide downhill and you also naturally start to produce more estrogen. However, Mike O’Hearn, like one of God’s own miracles seems to have reversed this trend and found the font of youth and unsurpassed muscular development wayyyyy past his teens and twenties.
Now, the problem is, it is extremely unlikely that Mike O’Hearn is ‘natty’, he will profess until he is blue in the face but, a little like Simeon Panda all tests to validate his nattyness appear to be on their own terms.
Therefore, already there is perhaps a slight reason to question his honesty thus far, yet, Mike appears to have really pushed the boat out this time and is offering his secret to an age defying physique by freeze drying duck eggs (you read that correctly) and charging $699 for a months supply! You literally could not make this up – although Mike already has. Like The Pardoner of Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales, who, the charlatan “officially” forgives people’s sins for a price and excels in fraud, carrying a bag full of fake relics.
In addition to his duck egg elixir, The Pardoner has also coined another wonderful piece of bodybuilding audaciousness in the shape of ‘The Frog’, now, to the untrained eye and to many housewives the world over, The Frog is just another Ab Wheel that can be found for a little over $10-15, yet true to Mike’s other products there has been a vast mark up – it costs $1500 !
Admittedly, The Frog does come with 4 wheels instead of the obligatory 1 wheel of a standard Ab Wheel and a few elastic bands which can be useful to bundle your mail together but even so, this is is staggering faith in a product that The Pardoner would almost blurt out his frothy ale.
So, Mike O’Hearn: a figure of God, or the Devil himself?